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Reprinted with permission by
The Star-Ledger, Newark, New Jersey

Rude Awakening:
It's not your imagination.
It's a crude world out there.
Sunday, May 04, 2003
By Lisa Irizarry
Star-Ledger Staff

Whatever your definition of rudeness -- loud cell phone calls, cursing, nervy comments, someone not holding a door for you, "flaming" (angry) e-mails, road rage or waiting for a salesperson to finish a personal conversation before being helped -- you're probably experiencing a lot more of it.

Psychologists, authors, customer service experts and others not only have found uncivil behavior on the rise in the past few years, it has become the subject of several studies, with some showing bad behavior is so pervasive it's affecting mental health and the workplace.

In his 1999 book, "Bowling Alone," Harvard University Professor Robert D. Putnam already was talking about incivility as an epidemic -- caused in America by the declining sense of community to which automobiles, suburban life and television have contributed.

Two years later, a study conducted by a psychologist at the University of Michigan-Ann Arbor, found rudeness so pervasive in the American workplace that it was having a serious impact not only on mental health, but also on productivity. Out of 1,100 professional and clerical workers surveyed, 71 percent said they had experienced put-downs or other rude behavior on the job; in some cases, the encounters led to anxiety and depression.

In December 2002, a survey conducted by the Boston Bar Association of judges, clients, new lawyers and mental health professionals found pervasive rudeness among the state's 44,456 attorneys. Their offenses: Swearing at each other in open court, "making faces, guttural noises or laughing" during proceedings; older attorneys acting arrogant and dismissive with newer lawyers and also interrupting judges.

If all that's not enough, we still suffering the fallout from 9/11 and the war with Iraq, as people have become even more stressed out and fearful about an uncertain future.

Although concern for others and helpfulness increases during times of crisis, it can be short-lived and it never applies to all people, notes psychologist Joyce Brothers.
"We have a lot of negative emotions like anxiety, fear and worry," Brothers says. "We have very few positive emotions -- joy, happiness, positive feelings toward each other -- love. When we're unhappy or anxious, the negative ones can come to the forefront."

"With the economy and now the war -- everything that distracts people from what they're supposed to be doing contributes to this rudeness," explains Terry Wall, a Gloucester Township-based expert on workplace trends. "The closer you get to a deadline, the more that's piled up on your desk, you just start reacting to things. When you're distracted with something else, it (courtesy) goes out the window."

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